A dear neighbor passed away recently and her son, John Boe, wrote this in tribute to her. With John's gracious permission, I share it here to help us all reflect on our love for our mothers.
–Carolyn
My lovely mother, Jane Quimby, passed away on March 29th. Those words still seem unreal to write. Her husband, Bruce Sabaini, and I stayed by her side until the end. It was the hardest thing I have ever done, but she deserved our presence.
She was 77 years old, and had been vibrant and healthy until March 6th when she was diagnosed with metastatic & inoperable colon cancer. She chose to enter hospice care shortly after coming home (anyone who knew her would know that chemotherapy would have never been an option for her). We thought we would have a few good months, but unfortunately her disease progressed very rapidly. It’s still hard for me to believe that we celebrated our birthdays together (she always said I was her best birthday present ever) on February 18th and that she was bowling the week before going to the hospital.
As I have sat by her side or laid awake at night these past three weeks I’ve had a lot of time to reflect on many things:
No one will ever love you as unconditionally as your mother. No one will ever care about your accomplishments, your losses or sadness like your mother. You will never have a relationship like the one with your mother again. Cherish every moment you get. Answer the phone call, go on the lunch date, or just take a walk. Invite them to events, parties, and award ceremonies.Get off your phone and speak to them. Listen to their stories, even if you’ve heard them before. Eat the food they cook for you (if your lucky enough to have one that does this) and tell them how great it is. Don’t assume you will some day have the time with her to do all these things. Tomorrow is not promised.
Take pictures. Be in the pictures. I took so few of my mom and me over the last 20 years. When I think of all the times we were together and how few pictures I have… Be in pictures with your spouse, kids and friends too. If something happens to you tomorrow your family is not going to be looking for pictures of themselves.
My mother told me many times that she did not fear death. She was a strong Christian and was looking forward to seeing all of her friends and family again that preceded her in death. I know she found her way in to the Good Lord’s embrace yesterday.
ORDER OF SERVICE:
Welcome & Announcements Rev. Dr. Carolyn Scanlan-Holmes
Song: You Are the Sunshine of My Life Written and Recorded by Stevie Wonder
Sung today by Doran Nash
Message Part 1: Kids’ Moment - My Mother’s Chair by Rev. Dr. Carolyn Scanlan-Holmes
and LeaAnn Koekenberg
Candle Lighting and Universal Words of Welcome and Prayer
Christina Fidone
Song: Landslide Written by Stevie Nicks. Recorded by Fleetwood Mac.
Sung today by Julie Hackett
Message Part 2: Are You My Mother
Rev. Dr. Carolyn Scanlan-Holmes
Message Part 3: Love You Forever
Rev. Dr. Carolyn Scanlan-Holmes
Song: Mama, This One’s For You Written and Recorded by Beth Hart
Sung today by Whitney Carpenter
Benediction by Rev. Dr. Carolyn Scanlan-Holmes